It most certainly came as a shock to me to have found children here. I mean, there was literally  a bunch of nine these year-olds anticipatedly sitting at the waiting room/lounge during the thirty-minute window prior to the show. You could see the excitement on their faces as their innocent hearts could not wait for another second for their clearly premeditated vision and hope of seeing giant dinosaur figures, souped-up robots and mythical dragons on steroids. And by steroids I mean having developed a metal skin plating because they evolved into robot dragons.

I’m not exaggerating here. And I’m not saying that these kids are just being the high minded, creative little dreamers that they could be sometimes. I was there and we actually witnessed all those things materialize before our very eyes…

Out first came the dragon robot with metal plating, with an extraterrestrial being, plated as well and looking like one of those underground creatures from the first episode of ‘One Punch Man’, riding on top of it. Then followed one dragon after another plus other supersized earth animals as they attempted to challenge the plated robot dragon and its alien overlord in coldblooded melee combat.

 

Alongside the robot dragon was a tank; almost directly extracted from a post-apocalyptic steampunk movie. On top of it stood this Japanese woman, scantily clothed in an all black, skimpy up-skirt outfit; high steamy fishnet stockings, heels and all. Apparently she was supposed to be an evil stripper queen that’s threatening all of humanity of enslavement by alien overlords, or so it seemed. At one point, the invaders engaged in a battle to the death against some terrestrial dragons manned (or should I say ‘womanned’) by more scantily clothed women. Yes they were riding the dragons. Go figure.

The conflict ultimately ended when the alien overlord was vanquished in battle and when the stripper vampire queen was devoured by a giant snake. The creatures and their heroins gleefully celebrated shortly after.

And that was just one part of the show.

I’m not high up in my butt hole nor am I delusional as well. I don’t take drugs either but this might have looked exactly like a scene a person high on LSD would see.

This is Robot Restaurant, a very interesting restaurant/cafe in downtown Shinjuku, Tokyo that thrives on neon rainbow lights, crazy random shows and of course, women who wear clothes significantly lacking in thread. (There was a ton of the latter by the way; which made me wonder why there were actually kids watching in the first place.)

Don’t fret just yet though because this isn’t a strip club nor a gladiator arena. We can just leave it as a PG-13, massive costume party, robot and special effects show, held together by a weird narrative that makes no sense whatsoever. But nothing more. I gotta hand it to the choreography director though as the dances were nicely done.

Without a doubt Robot Restaurant is worth the money as it will leave you with piercing questions about life and the universe… Kidding aside, the worst effect that it could ever have on anyone is achieving a personal best in getting the most WTF moments in a single sitting. And even that is inevitable. But all in all, it’s just pure entertainment and for sure will keep you at the edge of your seat the whole time with all the special effects, outrageous outfits, utter randomness in general and the catchy upbeat mainstream music that would play during the dances. And of course, the subtle touch of Japanese culture will make anyone who particularly appreciates that kind of stuff enjoy as well.

And for the general public? You’ll be all smiles after the event for a variety of reasons. Guaranteed. *Wink. Well, unless you’re a dementor, or dementee for that matter.

You have got to see the show for yourself, which I heard changes every now and then. This is why the narration I previously relayed at the beginning of this article was intentionally made confusing to visualize. It was nothing more than a teaser, devoid of any real spoilers so you can come on down and see the madness for yourself.

You may make reservations on their website to get a discount and see some previews of what to expect as well.

Will I be going again? Probably not for my own personal reasons. And there’s no way I’m bringing a nine year-old to the showas I don’t consider it to be for general audiences. But then again, as it’s one of those attractions heavily blogged and vlogged about; definitely a must-see. The food’s average and quite overpriced though so be reminded to eat before or after the show.  And don’t get me wrong I did have a ton of fun and don’t regret it one bit… I  totally recommend it to anyone looking for some random humor and special effects entertainment because Robot Restaurant will not disappoint.